Tips for Living from the Dutch
Do Nothing
In British culture it is taught that relaxation is a reward, we can sit down once we have completed our never ending to-do list.
A nation that is constantly occupied by tasks or looming future responsibilities, only seconds before sleep does the mind grow quiet.
A major difference I've observed while living in the Netherlands is that it is not seen as slacking to want to take a moment out of your day to relax and be 'unproductive'. Dutch people don't feel guilty for lounging and allowing themselves time to think about how they feel. I notice that many people just sit outside of a coffee shop and observe the passers by. Watching other people can bring comfort and remind you that your worries may be far less than those of the strangers on the street. It is so important to allow yourself to think about how you feel in the present moment, a life filled with ceaseless distraction leaves no space for inner thought. Allot yourself a time each day to relax and let your mind wander, if you don’t know how you’re feeling then nobody else has any chance of figuring it out.
Employees also seem to accommodate this time for solace, it is much more common here to not work 5 days a week or at least have a couple of half days. Capitalism but make it chill?
2. Illusive Dressing
Dutch people love sandals, flip-flops, Birkenstocks, you name it. At first I found it difficult to get on the sandal bandwagon but once you lean into the open toe movement it feels sacrilege to put a shoe on ever again .
I figured out that wearing flip flops in your daily life gives the illusion that you might just run onto the beach at any point.
The Dutch have a strange juxtaposition between casual and corporate. The business men have perfectly tailored suits paired with long shaggy hair and a surfer-esque tan. I like the premise of false dressing, dress for the beach even for a morning of boring errands. Your clothing should have an air of mystery surrounding what your intentions are for the day.
Dry Cleaners at 13.00, Ocean at 14.00.
3. Een Fiets Kopen
Cycling is the main form of transport, much like many Scandinavian countries. Although this takes a while to get used to, I hate to admit it may be the best way to get around. However, cycling in Amsterdam should require a Xanax prescription. The best thing about cycling is that you don’t need a gym membership. Get to work, breathe some fresh air and burn some calories on the way! Let alone how much money you save on public transport or financing a car. The dream!
4. Say it, See it, Sort it
Dutch people are renowned for their forwardness. I spent the first few months here getting by with my learned British politeness where to be an inconvenience to another person is the cardinal sin. I said I wasn't hungry when I secretly was, I queued when nobody else was and waited too long to cross the road for fear of collision with 100 bikes. There have been countless times where someone has said something to me here and I have been shocked at the straight-up nature of the statement:
"You shouldn't do your hair like that, it looks bad"
"Why are you standing there, you’re really in the way?"
"I’ve heard that most British girls are not very attractive?" (Thanks mate…)
It's a culture shock. But everybody knows where they stand here, there is no sugar coating. Although seemingly brutal, it becomes super refreshing to know exactly what your peers want as it removes so much miscommunication. You are never left wondering what people are really thinking, trust me, they will let you know…
Life would be a lot easier if we took a leaf from the book of the Dutch.
5. CAN you complain?
In the Netherlands there is an environmentally forward incentive which gives money as a reward for recycling glass bottles and cans. Each bottle is worth 15 cents.
Although not the initial intended outcome, this method is now one of the main ways that homeless people manage to earn a little bit of cash. The cities are full of people collecting discarded cans, this is a sad sight to see yet also an effective form of both cleaning the streets of litter while helping those less fortunate. I like this concept as in the UK it is very difficult to earn money as a homeless person, if not impossible. Nobody can object to people picking up litter. One man's trash is another's treasure.
Some complain that people searching for the cans leave a mess, yet I feel that this is probably something you just have to accept. If you have the time to worry about a stray can on the floor then you’re probably quite lucky.
6. Be on time. Always
I am personally a stickler for timings, repetitive lateness equates to rudeness in my eyes and the Dutch seem to agree.
They are a nation that are always on time and so is their public transport, each train arrives exactly when it should. As a Brit this feels like the height of development, we are so used to being tricked into thinking disorganisation is just a natural part of life.
There is also very important train etiquette, basically don’t speak and if you are on the phone then you are the worst and everyone is secretly hoping you will fall through the gap.
Living here makes you realise that this is how life would look back home if money went to where it should and public welfare was taken as priority. If people didn't scribble boobs on the windows or spill cider over the carriage floor, tucking your feet into your chest to avoid the sticky, unspecified liquid slithering towards your feet.
The strange thing about being in the Netherlands is that it’s the similarities of home that surprise you rather than the differences, when you live abroad you expect to feel like an outsider so things get weird when it feels strikingly familiar. The culture here is not all that different from the UK but they seem to have got something right whereas we haven’t, and that’s what makes you think.
7. Au Naturel
Dutch girls are some of the most gorgeous in the world, it is really quite humbling.
Yet they don’t like to show that they have taken the time to groom themselves and put effort into their appearance, although it is clear that they have. Beauty treatments and routines are kept secret and done in the privacy of one's home. It is super chic to appear like you just woke up looking like a Victoria's Secret model and you didn’t spent 40 minutes blow-drying your hair.
Maybe this promotes unrealistic beauty standards, it kind of does. However, I like that self-care is treated as a sacred and hidden ritual.
In short, look beautiful and make an effort…. but never tell anyone that you have.
8. All my homies love Calvinism
Dutch people are extremely egalitarian and don’t take kindly to hierarchy.
People are not impressed by social status or wealth like they are elsewhere, nobody cares that your dad has money and in fact you might go down in standing because of it. It is super common for celebrities to integrate with the general public at events and there are few 'VIP' rooms. The Dutch don't see the point in treating someone like they are above them, flattery gets you nowhere.
^ (That’s a rough 54…)
The French theologian Jean Calvin (1509-1564) exerted a major influence on the Netherlands, he rejected all forms of hierarchy and believed everyone should be treated equally no matter their social rank. This belief also contributes to the perceived "rudeness" of the Dutch. They see no point in sugar-coating to make you feel better or not hurt your feelings, Calvin preached that you should never cover up failings with flattery. This is opposite to the British way where we would apologise if someone hit us with a truck.
